Friday 26 August 2016

And We're Married




Having rested in the drafts for close to six months, call it instinct or procrastination, I never felt it was the right time to publish this post. This video was shot within the pages of a test-run, the concept I wanted to structure it around came in much later. But somehow it couldn’t see the light of the day. Until, having lived that concept now, the eve of my anniversary (six months) seemed just the right moment to share this. This video and the following words are my attempt at sharing the structural and platonic shift that accompanied me after getting married and moving to a new place (Typing the post's title took me back to my first post and was enough to give me goosebumps). Maybe, I do a good job at it! 

Dwelling back in time, my husband and I were batch-mates in school, started dating while we were in college, dated for about nine years and finally got married. I feel, my words about getting married and the hum drum that accompanies an Indian wedding will be mere drops in an ocean of all that wed talk, so I’ll safely jump to the life that starts post-marriage, which, contrary to popular belief isn’t all about lots of sex or snuggling up for movies. 

Getting married introduces a couple to many challenges, which in a subtle way can be life altering and also pushing enough for you to explore and dive into all those innate, subconscious life lessons your parents and your story-so-far gave you. I am lucky to have married someone I knew so closely, which is why sharing an emotional or physical space came easy. There wasn’t any (as it might be called) adjustments involved. We know and understand each other’s professional demands, schedules, habits – eating and living alike, so yes it did come in easy. In the present world, the moment we begin to speak about managing a house, conversations are quick to boil over the whole idea of working women empowerment, independence, the equality in partnership theory and the like, and yes bearing that onus and responsibility can be overwhelming at first. I did have a feeling or rather the belief (which girls these days consider as cool) that I don’t know anything. But once again, thanks to my mum who managed both her professional life and her home so perfectly and thanks to a lifetime of lessons absorbed observing her and yes thanks to our helpers (they deserve so much credit), looking after our house, cooking, and doing its interiors (if you follow me on Snapchat, you know it’s my new found love) is something I fell in love with immediately. So, like I mentioned at the start…the challenges are of a happy kind! 


However, if I can be completely honest, coping with the professional arena has been the hardest for me. I have been truly blessed to have my husband and my family, provide a support system that encourages me to go out, chase my dreams and be the sport when it comes to achieving them. However, moving to a new city and putting together and getting oneself accustomed to the resources has been a challenge for me. The people are new and so is their approach and method towards work. Shoot locations don’t come easily and it’s been difficult to churn quality content for brands. On the other side, this straight line curve has been a boon in helping me strategize and work on newer avenues, concepts and business models. 


Any change in life is bound to cause a tectonic shift in our approach towards it. I do reckon that marriage is that “new phase” that’s often talked about and pondered upon by all of us. But this change is also that time in your life when you’ll mature as an individual, expand (or rather double) your capabilities, grow your horizons, multiply your ideas and have an undefined, subconscious desire to be better that what you were before. However, wherever this journey takes many of you and myself, let it most importantly be about love…because in the end that is and was all that really mattered!

Wearing - 

Maxi Dress (Worn as skirt) - TrimmingsAndLace (here)
Shirt  (Up for grabs on my Spoyl profile) - Thrifted 
Sandals - River Island

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Agam